More time...

Christmas in 5 days...what???

It feels nothing like Christmas time, and it really doesn't even feel like December.  A few days ago, I realized why preparing for this Christmas was more challenging for me than the past.  This is my first Christmas, that I will not have a month off from school.   This is the first time that I am not preparing to come home from college to be with family and see friends.  I have been here the whole time.  This past week, was just another week.  Nothing spectacular about it.

Some may call me Scrooge or Bah Humbug, but maybe its only because Christmas is not the season we are really in.  Never in my life, have I understood the season of Advent so clear.  Taking all this time to prepare, prepare for what, something that we do every year?  But no, this is a time of preparation for Christ Jesus to be born, in a stable, to a woman who was single! This is a time of preparation to see how incredible our Holy Father really is!!

There are some days in my life that believing in God, is just like wearing shoes.  We all do it. But then they are some days, that I struggle to understand the concept of not believing in him. How can live be livable without knowing that he is there to take your hand, or catch you by the shoulders when you are about to fall flat on your face??  And then there are days that he is standing there watching the complete awe of the happiness and joy in our world.  He is there when we are running around like a washer machine, working to be in all places at once when magnificent things are happening.  These are the days, that I must remind myself to praise him, to glorify him, because he is the reason that magnificent days happen! 

Every notice how the shipping and handling prices can sometimes be a ridiculous percent of what you are ordering?  I recently ordered 16 trunks for LEOS (Lenoir Emergency Outreach Shelter), soon to be opening, from CN&N Everything SummerCamp.  When talking to the sales rep about ordering this many at once, I was curious if I could recieve a discount.  They decided to offer me free shipping and handling, that was a whole $300.00+.  Wow! And then my next order was to American Bedding, where I was ordering 10 sets of bunk beds, 20 xl-twin bed bug proof mattresses, 20 xl-twin bed bug proof mattress covers, and 20 safety rails.  When talking to the sales rep, I asked him the same question, and he responded with not sure.  Turned out he could get me at 15% discount, but I still had the shipping and handling fee of almost $500.  With a little talk, a lot of connections, an amazing company, and God's hand in play...BERNHARDT furniture picked up our shipment and delivered to us, with no shipping cost. 

God really is good! It is days like these when I need to remember to get down on my knees, talk to the LORD and say Thank you!  

Dear heavenly Father, without you precious guidance, I would be no where close to where I am now.  Who knows what I would be doing.  You helped me to see my calling and to be lead to where I can do what I am called to do.  We only have 5 days left to Advent, and wow I need more time.  I feel I need more time.  Blessed Father, everything is only possible with you.  I want you to lead me, I want to follow you.  In Jesus holy name, amen. 

Not even a Lamb

As we finish the month of November, we have most likely spent time giving thanks for what we have and whom we have in our lives.  It is a time that we make space to see family and friends.  And now we enter a time of preparation, for one of the largest holidays in America.  Malls are jammed packed and and roads are practically parking lots.  Most everyone is rushing around buying Christmas gifts for family and friends.  Black Friday has come and gone, likely made a huge impact in bank accounts and likely to impact under the Christmas tree on Christmas morning.   But is there something more that we are preparing for?  

 Today is the beginning of a new year!  Today is the start of Advent, a time that we are preparing and anxiously awaiting the birth of Christ.  We are entering the time of a new year, as we slowly but eagerly reach one of my favorite times of the year....

On the night before Christmas, when all through the stable, not a creature was moving, not even a lamb.  The hay was all nice molded together, in hopes that the babe would soon be born.  Mary and Joseph were eagerly awaiting, while the comfort  of animals were snug all around them.  

WAIT, that is not how the story goes!  But it is how the story goes, the one that is my favorite time of year!  My favorite night is Christmas Eve.  No, it is not because I may get to open presents early or eat the best cookies ever, but it is because we celebrate the birth of Christ!  We remember and re-live the excitement of the baby Jesus being born.  We rejoice that Christ is coming again, he is coming to be among us!

Christ has chosen to come down from the heavens to be with us, to be with the people of God.  He calls us to FOLLOW HIM, Jesus says in Matthew 4, 'Come and follow me and I will make you fishers of men'.  Jesus wants us to FOLLOW HIM and to not worry about anything else, because he has a plan! Jesus is with us, he is around us all the time keeping us in line. 

In the wonderful world that we live in, there are people that are without.  I am sure you have seen people standing on street corners asking for money for food with some story as to why they are there.  You may have seen someone walking the streets, barely with a jacket on, noticing it is below 40 degrees.  But there are also people in our communities that are too proud to ask for help and do not want to be assumed they are in need.  All of these people  need our help!  They need a place to stay, a warm safe place away from the weather. 

This is a place that I feel god is calling me, he has said, 'Come, Follow me' and I am working hard on that!  It is not easy, it will not be easy, but I am eager and excited to see where he is leading me.  It is not going to be easy to remember to follow him, especially in times of struggle and let downs, but thankfully I have a wonderful support family that is hear for me. 

Lenoir has never had a place that homeless men can come and stay out of the weather.  Coming late this December there will be a place that men, women, and children without a home can stay in order to get back on their feet.  We have unaccompanied teenagers that need a safe place to stay, so that they can complete school.  I encourage you to read the article here: Lenoir Newstopic | LEOS Opening late December

In all that we do, in all that you do, in all that I do... we need to work on tending the fire of our faith.  As we sit by a campfire we want to keep it glowing, keep it burning and keep it growing so that the fire does not go out and we do not become cold.  Keeping a campfire glowing, burning and growing is not easy and is just as important as keeping our fire of faith doing the same!  Losing our fire of faith, will not result in any good thing.  Let's continue to glow, burn, and grow the fire of faith strong!

DEAR HEAVENLY FATHER THE ONE THAT KNOWS EVERYTHING ABOUT US... I AM THANKFUL FOR YOUR CALLING US OUT TO FOLLOW YOU.  WE ALL NEED THE GUIDANCE IN OUR LIVES AND WHAT BETTER WAY THAN TO FOLLOW THE ONE THAT IS OUR LOVING LORD.  YOU HAVE A PASSION TO TAKE CARE OF US AND TEACH US HOW TO HAVE A PASSION TO SERVE YOU BY SERVING OTHERS.   I LOVE YOU LORD JESUS.  I THANK YOU FOR PLACING PEOPLE IN MY LIFE, TO BE HERE FOR ME WHAT I AM IN NEED.  THE LOVE THAT YOU PROVIDE TO US IS INCREDIBLE AND ABSOLUTELY BREATH TAKING. IN JESUS CHRIST, HOLY NAME. AMEN!

Baptized and set free

As a Child of God, baptized and set free, I am clothed in Christ.  Without Christ, facing life is not possible.  He is with us through trials and struggles, through joys and praises, through discernment, through all our lives.  

"Give your life to God", "Hand God your concerns and struggles", these are phases that I have heard and I am sure you have too.  While it is often spoken with such absolute, the actual fact of doing such thing is not so easy.  I want to give my life to God, I want him to lead me in down the path that has designed for me.  

Ten years ago when someone asked me, where do you see yourself in 10 years?  At the age of 14, I most likely, responded with: teaching in an elementary school or teaching exceptional children or something to do with teaching in schools.  Would I have ever guessed then, that I would be preparing a resident policy for a homeless shelter?  Would I have ever guessed that I would be part of making crucial decisions for the coming soon homeless shelter?  There is no way, that 10 years ago, I would have ever guessed that now in 2014 I would have a important part in opening a homeless shelter in Caldwell County for men, women and children.  God has this plan for us that is breath-taking.  I hold to extreme value that everything I learned while studying to be an educator helps me each day.  I hold to extreme value that the road blocks that I hit in attempt to become an educator, has made me a stronger teacher.  I may not be a certified educator in the standards to teach in a school, but I teach everyday.  And I will continue to teach every day. 

And this is his commandment, that we should believe in the name of his Son Jesus Christ and love one another, just as he has commanded us. - 1 John 3:23

God is with us in all that we do.  I am finding that in my world right now, so much is going on.  There is a lot of anxiety and feeling lost.  My congregation has reached a time of transition.  This past June, we said goodbye to our pastor of 12 years.  He accepted a calling to a new church, the opportunity to continue on the path that God is leading him. We have welcomed in a supply Pastor each Sunday for the past 5 months.  This past Sunday we welcomed in a Interim Pastor.  Pastor Mike Riley will lead us in worship, visit Shut-ins, and doing some of the workings of the church.  He is with us as we journey together to prepare for a new pastor.   

I posted on Facebook this week about entering this time of transition. We are beginning a time for our congregation to refresh.  In order to welcome someone in we must move on and not reflect on how it always has been done.  Change is good.  No one likes it, but it is good for our souls so we can refresh. We need to flatten our lives out.  Give our lives and our search for a Pastor to Christ.  Believe it or not, but God already has that person picked out for us!  He is leading us to the man or women that is going to be our new Pastor.  Most likely this is going to be a long road.  Possibly exhausting, a times we may feel lost or discouraged, we may feel that there is no hope, but we must remain to have faith in our LORD Jesus.  

LORD JESUS, MY LIFE IS YOURS.  YOU KNOW MY CONCERNS, MY ANXIETIES, MY STRUGGLES, MY THOUGHTS.  YOU KNOW HOW TO HELP ME HANDLE THINGS.  I WANT TO GIVE MY LIFE TO YOU LORD! WALK WITH ME AS I WALK THE PATH.  WALK WITH MY CONGREGATION AS WE ARE ENTERING THIS PHASE OF TRANSITION.   AMEN.

What is the difference?

Some days can seem like they are never going to end.  Or a week may feel like it is going on for months.  But then some days fly by and some weeks seem like only a day or two.  

What is the difference?

Well, what I have found is the days and weeks that I am doing something I enjoy and am passionate about are the days and weeks that fly by.  On the days or weeks that I am only going through the motions and not squeezing in something that I am passionate about allow the days to feel like weeks and the weeks to feel like months.  

May was a long, tiring, wear me down month.  And while I was doing things I was passionate about, I also was not finding time to sit and listen and talk with Jesus.  I was filling my day so full that I did not have that quiet time to listen to him and his plans for me.  I was not allowing time to listen to the beauty that God created for each of us.  We live on and among things that we take for granted every day.  So during the month of June I have been working hard to do what I love, do my passion, make room for Jesus, and listen to the sounds of the earth. 

And what that mindset, June is flying by.  I cannot believe it is already June 18th!  This month is flying by and before I know it is going to be July.  With my work schedule, I am fortunate to have Wednesdays off.  During the past few months I have not been protective of my Wednesdays.  Some times I am working on through them, doing homework or not seeing the beauty in a day that I could be spending outside among the creation of our Lord.  For the past four weeks I have cherished by Wednesdays and I have loved being able to spend them outside or doing something new.  

Thankfully I work in my passion, I am doing what I love.  And I am doing what I feel God has called me to do. Working with the poverty and homelessness population is not ideal to some.  But for me it is ideal.  It is not ideal to me to work in middle schools, though I have a great friend that has a calling to teach middle school.  It is not ideal to me to be a chemist, though I have cousins that are.  Everyone may see something as crazy, but yet others may see what you do as crazy.  Everyone has a passion.  Everyone has a calling.  It does not matter what someone else thinks about your passion or calling, all that matters is what God has called you to do!  He will show you the way!

He may not lead you down a straight path, but who would want that?!?  Take the curve, dead ending road that may lead you back to where you started.  Every place that God leads us to is making an impact on what our life is going to be like.  I am so excited to see what God has planned for me, because so far I have such an assortment. 

Do what you love and don't worry what others think. 

Everyone has a passion, discover it and do it!

Be who you are, no one is better at than you!

Dear Heavenly Father, You know us better than we know ourselves.  Help us to have the patience to allow you to lead us down the path that you have planned for us.  While sometimes we would really like to know the path you have for us, remind us that you always have a plan.  I pray for my friends that have not discovered their passion yet, that they may discover it and do their passion.  Guide us in making a difference, even if it is only a small one.  Everyone can make a difference, no matter how small or big the action is.  Blessed to be a child of God.  I lift up prayers for all the silent, unspoken or un-thought prayers!  In Jesus holy name, I pray. Amen. 

God's definition of success

Last weekend, I spent time in Greensboro at a youth convention.  400+ Lutheran youth in North Carolina gathered together to study the bible, fellowship, share experiences, and prepare to make a difference. While this event may seem like just something that kids get into, I had my own moments.  After thinking through the years, I discovered that it was my 10th time at this event, Lutheran Youth Organization (LYO).  I went from being a participant as a delegate from my church, to being a bored member on the youth advisory time, to serving as a YARP (Young Adult Resource Person) as a college kid, to now being a adult adviser at the event.  

While spending the weekend with my church's youth group, I was also serving as a YARP, so I had dual responsibilities.  As I reflect about what I truly enjoyed about the weekend, I think it would have to be the chance to see the growing of so many people. I got to see individual youth in my group, become their own individual.  They are away from family and have the chance to be exactly who they want to be and hang out with complete strangers who they are already wanting to connect with. I got the chance to see kids that I have seen  in the past years, growing into amazing young men and women as God has planned for them.  I got the chance to see my best friend, little brother, make strong connections with his little brother, especially their special handshake. I got to see people that have had significant roles in my faith life continue to show me the ways of life. This is only a glimpse to what I saw at this weekend.  And finally, I got to see myself grow.  Role changing is weird, and I am still not a pro at it, but it will come as time comes.  I got to see myself begin becoming more open to trying new things and working with other children of God. 

During the weekend the youth at this event learned about the secret of their own success stories... how God sees success and how the world sees success. It is different and often we are challenged by the world's image of success and lose focus on God's definition of success.  Everyone learned about how simple it is to make a difference in the world.  

No matter our age, sometimes we need a little bump in our walk with God.  I know personally that after long days and weeks I feel that I am losing something, but often with prayer and time with God I am able to get back into the groove.  But before that weekend I had felt a bit lost and needing a little pickup to get back into the walk with God.  I am thankful that I got the chance to go as an adult adviser to see how living with other children of God of all ages we can learn about success stories and how special it is to make a difference and how exciting it is! 

We were blessed to be able to praise God with Rachel Kurtz and Agape.  Their music is enlightening.  I have shared two of my favorite songs below.  Make a Difference by Rachel Kurtz and Lutheran SWAG by Agape.  Rachel Kurtz's song is about how we want to make a difference with out lives.  It is so simply spoken it is just amazing. And Agape's song, Lutheran SWAG, is like no other song.  Many young people are into the rapping songs, well Agape does just that.  He raps about being Lutheran using theology too.  You are welcome to look up SWAG on Urban dictionary, but I am unsure what you will find, because the definition of SWAG here is Saved With Amazing Grace.  I personally don't think there is a better definition. Enjoy...

Lutheran SWAG

Make a Difference

Dear heavenly Father, I pray that you continue to walk with me as I learn about how your definition of success is much different than the world's definition. I want to continue learn and I pray for all children of God.  That we can walk together in the journey that you are guiding us for.  You walk side by side with us, and we are created in your image, so we are called to walk side by side with other brothers in sisters in Christ.  I pray for all of our walks! I pray for everyone! In your holy name, AMEN. 

Snow Days...

Before the worry about if work places are going to close down early or have an hour delay.  Before the concern of cars making it out of the driveway or sliding into a ditch.  Before the worry that you may bust your butt while walking around outside.  Before the worry about needing to get things done during the snow day.  Before the worry about if you have to get up in the morning to go to work....we had snow days!  

Snow days that you did nothing more than play outside all day from dawn to dusk.  Snow days that we rejoiced about when schools were cancelled half days or were called at 7am in the morning after we had gotten ready for school.  Snow days that meant finding the best hill to sled down (ice ones being the best).  Snow days that meant you had so many clothes on you didn't feel busting your butt.  Snow days that were the days you got to spend with some of your best friends.  Snow days that possibly meant curling up in front of the fire with hot chocolate or playing video games, just to warm up enough to go back outside.  Snow days.....oh how those were the days!

I have some of the best memories of snow days from when I was in middle school.  While honestly, it wasn't all that many years ago, it feels like it was forever go.  Some of the friendships I had then have come and gone, but that is how life is well.  The neighborhood that I have grown up in, had not just a handful of children, but a load full of children all within a few years of each other.  The memories from those days are so memorable, I am smiling and laughing just thinking about them.  While sometimes we did have "snow packets", math packets to do so that we didn't go without learning on snow days, we still made sure we played until it was dark. 

Memories of sledding down the hill, that is the road hill, but it was so icy that cars didn't even try.  Memories have sledding down the hill beside my house and sometimes going into the creek... Memories of attempting to walk to a friends/neighbors house, and it taking way longer than expected.  Memories of wondering if the snow would ever melt, but truthfully wanting it to stay forever, also knowing that that meant make up days.  Memories of heading inside to play video games, or watch the boys play video games, while we warm up. The memories go on and on, all ones that will always stay close to my heart and be remembered on current snow days. 

Snow days bring out the child in me, and I am so thankful for all the wonderful snow day memories.  Thankful that I grew up in a neighborhood that had so many other kids to play with it made snow days never boring.  Cabin fever never happened on those snow days.

Before finishing up, though I reflect back to the snow days before middle school.  The ones before many children lived in the neighborhood.  When there was only a few kids in the neighborhood.  But no snow day was ever gone unplayed...they were all well played! 

Thankful for friends and the memories of snow days. 

But have no fear... no snow day still is gone unplayed... my inner child comes out with the snow :)

Starting a new chapter

Over the last few days I have spent some time reading past blogs and notes that I found on Facebook.  Many important moments happen in our lives, and I have often wondered if I would remember them all.  My grandparents keep a journal, and I have often thought I should start one.. but that thought has never been put to action.  Below are some memories..

High school graduation reflection (posted 6/22/09)

So i made it through 13 years of school..and graduated on June 10, 2009. I made so many memories and many new close friends. I never guessed when I started my senior year that the friends I ended up with i would be so close to. When you are in band, you bond with the people you spend the most time with. Jojo my circus clown and Ms. crutches..are the amazing 2nd clarinets that I depended on. They were always there for me, even when I was in the worst of moods. From many flicks to eating crazy skittles...or txting each other in class. And of course for me I dont just hang out with girls, guys are my friends to. Chris has been there for me, hes a great listener but also has a brain full of advice. Anyways friends that make an impact on your life, place footprints on your heart for ever. It sticks with you like a piece of glue.

 Now I am leaving for college in just a few weeks and I never guessed that I would have so many friends that I would miss at home. There are many other people that have been in my high school years that I have been close to. So..to those that I am leaving behind you stand tall and make the 13 years of school the best time of your life. But to one person that is the bestest friend I have ever had. I will miss you so much and I know that even if you dont t hink you are going to. You are going to fall into my footsteps at church and amoung the timothys and ruths. You are an amazing person and your whole theroy of not hating anyone is amazing, I definitly cant do that. No matter what dont stop being the best little brother in the whole world!

College grad reflection 

When I entered college in 2009, I think I went in determined to come out with a education major, close ties to high school friendships, and graduate four years later.  But so much more happened.  I have now made it through 13 years of grad school and 4.5 years of college.  I graduated on December 13, 2013 (Friday the 13th) with my degree in Human and Community Service..yes that is right... not an education major!  I went through curvy road and trials during college but have come out to be someone that wants to follow a passion that I have developed.  I have a desire to serve the least of these population and teach in ways that I was unaware of. While I sometimes miss high school days, it is only for some of the friendships, but then again I am so thankful.  I am thankful for the amazing friendships I made during college.  Ones that I had no idea that were gonna happen during my final semester.  Friends come when they are needed, even when you don't think you are looking for one. But I also maintained some very important friendships that lasted though high school and college. 

The advice that I gave in 2009 is still relevant. Stand tall and make ALL your years of school the best time of your life.  Friends that are for real will stick with you forever.  Be true to yourself.  Be you. Be you-tiful.  Let God lead you.  Have patience.  Follow GOD, for the LORD your God is with you wherever you go.

Just some thank yous

I am blessed beyond measures for so many people and I would never want to let someone think I forgot them. But with that said, voicing thank yous is often something that is hidden away, but I feel that words of affirmation are very important.

• Thank you to my parents for always being supportive and showing me that everything will work out, even if sometimes it is questionable.  To all my family that constantly stands behind me giving support during highs and lows.  Family is a very important to me and I am blessed to have some people awesome people in mine!
• Best friends don't always come easy, and I will say that I never really had one best friend through school.  That is until I got to college and roomed with a girl that I never imaged would become my best friend and sister!  We had so many amazing moments during college, the list is unending and I am so thankful.
• Role models are not just people that are older than you, they can be people that you look up to in varies of ways.  To someone that teaches me daily to love those that may be my enemy, to pray for those that are prayerless, to be completely loving to everyone and open to everyone.  You are the best little brother ever, best friend! 
• To those friends that I met during college either early on or later in my career. Thank you to those friends that survived the years of college apart.  Thank you to those that stayed close though thick and thin moments in life.  I am truly thankful.
• And thank you to my church family and to GOD.  Nothing is possible without God, and nothing is possible without learning about God.  I have been raised in any amazing church with very supportive people.  To those I am truly thankful.

No one was left out on purpose, because everyone falls into one of those categories. 

This reflection only gives a glimpse of my college career and the memories that I have.  It is only a glimpse of the appreciation that I have to so many people. I am excited to see why God is leading me.

Dear Heavenly Father, 

You are amazing and I truly thank you for everything that you have taught me and continue to lead me on the path that you have drawn out for me.  I pray for those that are cold, without shelter, without food, without safety. I pray that they are able to make it through these freezing nights and take shelter in places that can help them.  I pray for the men and women that daily fight to protect us, that give their lives so that we may remain free.  I pray for all family members and friends, for those far and near, those silent and loud.  I pray that all silent prayers are lifted up. I pray that you show your love to those that are even pondering who you are.  I love you LORD Jesus.  In your holy name, AMEN!